What are some of the things no one tells you about the way cheaters think? Well, we are here to tell you more about psychological facts about cheating.
First things first, cheating is a pattern of behavior. We often talk about infidelity. But how often do we talk about the psychology behind it? Why do people look for love and physical contact outside of their relationship?
Well, today, we might try to understand how cheaters think. We will provide you with insight into the mind of cheaters and their desire for sex.
Remember, there is not a single reason or path for cheating. There are always different reasons, different paths, and patterns.
Now, let’s get the gender dilemma out first. Men are more likely to admit infidelity than women. But that doesn’t mean men are more likely to cheat. Fun psychological fact for you: in the past several years, rates of female infidelity have increased by 40%. At the same time, rates have remained the same for male infidelity.
The Millennial Dilemma
In the past several years, millennials have opened different discussions. Millennial dating trends have opened up the binary of monogamy. For starters, it has allowed people to define the boundaries of the relationship.
And that has changed the conversation of what constitutes cheating. Is it purely physical? Or it is an emotional affair as well. Where do we draw the line?
Nowadays, people define infidelity in different ways. Because of that, what counts as cheating for you might be acceptable for someone else.
And just to get the porn question of the way. One out of 10 people considers watching porn as cheating. With that in mind, here are some psychological facts about cheating and cheaters.
It May Not Be About You
Fun psychological fact: in many cases, you are not to blame for the infidelity. Yes, in most cases, you are to blame, but it is not always up to you. Maybe you should stop beating yourself down.
In most cases, cheating occurs as a result of one person fearing conflict or confrontation. Sometimes, the person in the relationship might have decided he doesn’t want to put up anymore. And he/she cheats as a way to get out of the relationship.
But sometimes, people cheat as a stress reliever in life. When things get overwhelmed, we look for a situation where we just do not have to think about anything else. And that is purely sexual intercourse.
Cheating Against Fear Of Conflict
Sometimes, cheaters turn to infidelity because they do not want to get into a fight about something that has been bothering them. For them, emotional cheating is an outlet for these frustrations. Instead of addressing them, they look for cheating as a way out.
The cheater knows there is a problem in the relationship. But they do not want to address it. And they do not believe any conversation will make a change. And cheating allows them to escape the problem and the relationship altogether.
In some cases, cheating is not a way to show you are angry. Instead, it is a way to feel you feel hopeless, desperate, and out of control.
People often cheat out of hopelessness. They feel there is nothing left. They have given up, and do not want to put an end to the relationship. And when there are logistic reasons to stay in the relationship, like money, kids, and lifestyle, an affair is the only way out.
For them, cheating is a feeling of security and comfort when everything else is out of control.
Cheating Out Of Anger
This is an infidelity reason you have caused with your actions. Your partner feels angry and frustrated in the relationship. They feel you do not care, do not listen, and do not support them.
And when your partner feels frustrated in the relationship, he/she will cheat as an act of defiance and avoidance. Instead of confronting the problem, they cheat their way out of it.
Cheating Is Gender Neutral
We touched a bit on this subject before. But let’s talk more about gender cheating facts. We always hear it, men are more likely to cheat. But that argument has been debunked.
In 2011, Indiana University conducted a study and found out that men and women cheat at the same rate. But the gap widens with age. Older men are more likely to cheat than older women.
In any case, whether it is male infidelity or female infidelity, people cheat because of personal reasons, not biological.
Cheating With Familiar People
You might think your cheating partner will do it with someone you do not know. And she/he doesn’t know. But the fact of the matter is people cheat with someone they already know. Why is that?
Because there are more opportunities to engage in an extramarital affair with someone you see frequently. And there is another reason.
When people cheat, they usually look for something more than sex. This applies even more to women. While for some men cheating is purely a physical sexual affair, for women it is more.
People who cheat want intimacy and emotional connection. And you can get that with someone you have forged an existing relationship and friendship with.
A Troubled Relationship
When you are in a good and nurturing relationship, you are less likely to have an affair. It is that simple. Yes, people who are happy cheat sometimes as well. But in most cases, cheating is a result of a troubled relationship.
High-risk Sexual Behavior
When you are in a committed relationship, sometimes, you worry too much. You take all sorts of precautions. For example, if you do not want to have children, you use condoms all the time.
Yet sometimes, people want to try something wild and risky. And that is when they seek an affair and sex with someone else. When people cheat for risky sexual behavior, they do not take any precautions.
Evening The Score
If you have cheated on your partner, expect him or her to do the same to you. A passive-aggressive cheat might see your infidelity as a way to do something similar as well. Even more, if your partner has a crush on someone he/she wants to have sex with. Your infidelity is his/her ticket to run free.
Your partner feels justified in cheating because he/she is basically evening the score.
The Seven-year Itch
Let’s finish our list of interesting psychology facts about cheating with the common dilemma. Is the seven-year itch a thing? Or is it just a myth about married couples?
Well, studies show it is really a thing. Men and women increase their desire for cheating around this time. But women’s odds of cheating decline after that.
On the other hand, rates of cheating in men decrease until the 20-year mark, and then increase again.